Crackers and HTML

[copied from dland]

So I haven't written in a little over a week, and I must say that there's something off-putting about writing and knowing that no one ever reads it. Not that I don't understand that IT'S A DIARY and generally people write in diaries without expectations of being read. Even so. An entry in the guestbook just to show that anyone has some idea that I'm doing this would certainly boost my self-confidence.

So I'm working on the school website and eating crackers, since I don't feel particularly interested in eating anything else. Husband is off teaching, as he does two nights a week, not that I would be making dinner if he were here. For one, I don't cook, almost never have. I used to like to cook. For two, since he's a vegan he makes all his own food, which I suppose is a good thing for me. So there you go.

I don't have an eating disorder, but I do have what I tend to call an extreme eating style difference. (For you fellow teachers out there, it's a like those learning style differences we keep hearing so much about.) I don't seem to eat like other people (except my sister). Meals are unimportant; I wouldn't care if I ever again sat down to eat a scheduled, or for that matter, complete and balanced, meal. If I'm hungry, I'll eat.

Which begs the question, am I hungry? The answer: rarely. And if I am, it doesn't generally bother me enough to make me want to eat. Most of the time, anyway. I have days when I can eat all day, one little bit of junk after another. I can never eat a lot of anything, but I can keep snacking -- noshing -- on and on. That's when I'm eating. Other days, I can have a cup of coffee in the morning, a slice of cheese in the afternoon, and a bowl of Lucky Charms at 11 pm, after I've slept for an hour or so and gotten up again. So my diet is pretty fucked up.

So I must be skinny, right? Sadly, not right. According to the charts and body mass index crap, I'm overweight by ten to fifteen pounds. How this happens I cannot imagine.

6:45 pm and I'm having Arizona iced tea and Ritz crackers. Since I'm trying not to have macaroni and cheese every night (my most favorite of foods, not that Kraft crap, and I can eat a lot of this food) and not more than once a week, that's out.

Maybe I'll have a fluffernutter again. I had two last night. Hmmm.


ENTRY #19