Ugh

I think my sister and I need couples' therapy. We're talking again, but she always sounds angry, and is picking on me for imagined things. We talked just now -- she had completely forgotten that we talked this afternoon -- and proceeded to tell me how I wasn't getting the right medical care, my doctors were not the right doctors, I was seeing all kinds of doctors who do nothing for me instead of seeing the one I need (!?) and she knows I like my gastroenterologist (Resnick), but she doesn't, and on and on. When I got a word in, I asked how she was feeling right now, and she said in a breathy voice "Like I have high blood pressure."

Whoa. She does not have high blood pressure -- I do -- she has chronically low blood pressure, so that scared me. I asked her why she felt that way, and she said it was from talking to me. Well. I could feel the tears starting, but I fought them down and all I wanted was for her to be calm. I explained that my situation was really under control, although it didn't look that way to her, and on and on, and after a bit, I asked if she felt better, and she said she felt that same. "Like you have high blood pressure?" I asked. "If talking to me gives you high blood pressure, you won't want to talk to me anymore." And she said, after a pause, "It was a figure of speech. You know I don't have high blood pressure."

What is wrong with me? Am I just taking everything too literally these days? If she said she felt like she was having high blood pressure, what was I supposed to know that means? Maybe a couples' therapist could teach us to communicate more clearly.

No doubt there's something up with me, and I have no idea what it is. I don't feel depressed, just sad about some actual situations, like the thing with my sister and K not having a job. I got stopped for speeding today, but I didn't get a ticket, just a warning. K told me later that I've been driving fast a lot lately. I asked if it was scary to ride with me, and she paused before saying no.

Not to mention which I got this haircut that I like and not a single person has said to me "Hey, I like your haircut!" Which tells me something.

The thing is, I feel like I am perfectly fine and myself, but apparently other people aren't perceiving me that way. Which fills me with a lot of self-doubt, and I don't like that at all. It may be time to start going back to therapy (although my sister doesn't think my therapists have done very well with me, since I still have flaws that she can see that haven't been resolved, flaws that no one ever mentioned to me and I am unaware of; maybe my problem is that my ESP is off.) But the next step will be that all of this will make me sick, and I don't need that.

I am so babbling now. All I want is to simultaneously finish a book, watch some Home Improvement, and go to sleep, since my alarm is set for 6:30 and I really have to get up this time. And did I mention that they're taking George Lopez off at 10 pm starting next week? No George?




watching THE BIG BANG THEORY :: ENTRY #2111
READING: The Lightning Thief by Rick Riiordan

Catching Up

I haven't really written much since I've been back, mostly because I wasn't comfortable with some of the things going on here, but either they're better now or I am, so I can write a bit about it.

Disney World, as much as I love it, is a physically demanding adventure, and none of us who went along are spring chickens. We were all in pain to some degree the whole time. It did occur to us to get wheelchairs on the third day; we got two, and switched off from time to time. I don't think we could have made it otherwise. Next time I go, I will definitely get a scooter (a motorized wheelchair-like thingy), but that's for another time.

When we would get back to our rooms at night, we were beat. I would do what I had to do pretty quickly, which is my nature: put the dirty clothes in a laundry bag, take out clean clothes for the next day, get my shoulder-bag ready for the next day, and collapse. I had two great nights' sleep there, one awful, and two okay. But my sister would take hours to get herself together, both at night and in the morning, and slept badly every night, and that for only a few hours. She was in a lot of pain during the day, and medicated herself for it. She had migraines three days out of five, but kept on going.

When I talked to her Sunday evening, she had been sleeping off an on all day and didn't sound great. She was still in a lot of pain, an arthritis flare-up. On Monday, she told that this was all my fault, and that I should have taken better care of her while we were away. I cried off an on for the next few hours, and she hasn't spoken to me since, although I think we're on better terms after texting last night and during the day today. Obviously, this was not my fault, and she gave no indication while we were away that she needed more help than I gave her. I myself was limping and using a cane when I wasn't in the wheelchair or pushing her in it (I was still limping, but no cane when pushing the wheelchair, which was actually better than the cane.) None of us were in great shape. Even so, the particulars aren't important; I don't know where she got this crazy idea, and it really threw me off for a few days. Not that I thought for a minute that she was right, but it made me very sad, and also made me really question myself: if she thinks that I'm capable of that, of not taking care of her for some capricious reason, what else does that say? That I'm not the person I think I am? That she, of all people, can't read me the way I think others can, and if so, who am I?

So I've been dealing a lot with that issue, and even though I've decided that the issue is hers -- maybe her husband's, but I don't want to go there with her -- it's been hard. Here, it's my last week before school starts, I've had a lot to do, and this was hanging over me.

In the meantime, K still has no job. A good possibility was supposed to call her back today either way, but of course, they didn't. So she's still left hanging. But that district doesn't start until after Labor Day, so she should still hear from them either way early next week. It would be a wonderful job in many ways. Still keeping everything crossed.

My knee was much worse, so I went to the orthopedist yesterday and got a better brace for it. He also gave me an anti-inflammatory creme for my elbows and various aches; so far, it's done nothing, but he wanted me to try it before I go back for the cortisone shots in my elbows. He also gave me some exercises for the plantar fasciitis, which is much worse after all that walking last week. I can pretyy much only wear Crocs now, which is okay, I guess.

Believe it or not, I'm also partially packed for the next trip, back to Florida, on September 11. That's only a two night trip, and not much walking. I'm hoping that R will be willing to do the driving, at least at night. I'm so glad she's going with me. On this one, we're both taking small suitcases and not checking them through, so everything is nice and compact, the way I like it. I've already got my dressies packed to wear to the Bar Mitzvah, and even my underwear and socks. All that's left is two days of day clothes, make-up, and meds.

Speaking of dressies, we have another damn party to go to this Sunday night, for the Hubs' aunt's 75th birthday. This family just loves to have big parties at their country club; every party is there, and so, is identical to the last one. And 5:30 on a Sunday night? How do they think of these things? So we have to drive to the ILs first and pick up the MIL; the FIL is not attending, and then drive back there later to take her home. It adds time, but I have no problem with that. I also told her that I will happily either attend the party or stay with the FIL, if she wants me to; either choice is fine with me, she just needs to tell me how to dress ahead of time. R and the GF, who live closer to the ILs, are also going to offer to stay with the FIL, so I may have to after all, but I have no idea what I'm wearing, of course, since my dressies are, as I said, packed. On the other hand, how much do I care? I'll find something.

Speaking of people who don't return calls -- I was somewhere, yes? -- once again, my principal had totally blown me off. When he didn't see me on Tuesday, I emailed him with all my free time this week, and I got no reply. So let's see. School starts Tuesday, Wednesday for the kids. It appears that there will be two new members of my staff, but I don't know what their jobs are and they haven't been hired yet. It will be my job to determine what their jobs are, and train them. Clerks or aides or something, but I don't know, and I don't know what their hours will be. As it stands, I have no assigned lunch period, other than the one mandated by my contract, which means I have to have one, but as far as I know, no one is assigned to cover the library during either lunch period. I may have to close the doors when I go. I guess. I have no idea what to do, or if he will tell me what to do before Wednesday. Although I'm sure that if I lock the doors during a lunch period, it'll get back to him. I guess I'll have to find a union person on Tuesday to tell me what to do. *sigh* As I recall, this was supposed to be the year I was excited about starting over and doing everything new. Well, this is new. I just so hate to be unprepared.

I've been reading an interesting scifi YA series by Scott Westerfield called Uglies, which is also the name of the first book. It's not what I expected, but I like it a lot. I'm on the third book of the trilogy, but then he wrote a fourth as a follow-up, I guess because it was popular, so I have that next.

Well, there you go, the entire contents of my brain spilled out on the screen. Hoping to see R tomorrow, or possibly Sunday. It's a rainy day and rainy weekend ahead, actually colder outside than in, today. Looks like some frozen White Castle cheeseburgers for dinner for me.



watching THE GOLDEN GIRLS :: ENTRY #2110
READING: Specials by Scott Westerfeld

Photo Phest

Here's our group picture from the land of The Mouse:


I'm on the right.

I got to Costco today and got those old slides made into prints, and got them on a disk as well, so here are some of those as well. It was an odd collection of pictures, not all from the same time. The way I look in these pictures is pretty much what I think I'm supposed to look like. Not that I think I should always look young, but I don't think I even look like the same person anymore.

I was the maid of honor at my sister's (first) wedding. I was 17.



Here I am in my parents' living room with my college boyfriend. Seriously. I dated this schlep for three years. I was surprised to see him on a couple of these slides, since I thought I had gotten rid of all pictures of him somewhere around 1975.


(I have those chairs in my living room, btw, but I refused to take the mirror.)

Here's a classic picture of my mother, the way we all really remember her:



Finally, here I am in the rocking chair with the baby twins. Did I post another shot of this recently? It seems I did, but I don't remember. His head, btw, is about the same size now. (He's 31.)




watching TWO AND A HALF MEN :: ENTRY #2110
READING: Uglies by Scott Westerfeld

Settled ... I Think

I got home about midnight on Saturday. Since then, I've been catching up, catching on, trying to get a handle on things. Which I may now have, or maybe not. This could be a long entry, and then again ...

First, the trip. The trip was excellent, despite the unbearable heat -- how do people live in Florida in the summer? -- and the constant pain we were all in from all the walking. The four of us never had a moment of conflict during the whole trip, and we had lots and lots of laughs. My sister was essentially sick the whole time -- a migraine every day -- but she persevered, and let nothing slow her down. I won't give you a play by play of the whole trip, but we were relaxed, saw what we wanted to see, and ate copious and delicious meals.

We got the meal plan because that's what made this such a good deal: the offer was a free meal plan if you stay five nights. I had never gotten the meal plan before, but let me tell you, I won't go without it in the future. It was a real steal. For example, I would get a cafeteria style breakfast (eggs, sausage, hashbrowns, bacon, biscuit) plus a drink and a snack, they would ring up $17.00, and I would give them my card and it would zero out the balance. Dinner for the four of us at nice restaurants would run from $120 to $150, and we would give them the card and it would zero it out. Even if you had to pay for the meal plan, it would still be a bargain.

I didn't take many pictures, but I'll share a few:


One of the few pictures I took at a park, of a Mickey topiary in the Hollywood Studios.


This is the s'mores dessert I had at the 50's Primetime Cafe. It was so good I had to take a picture of it.


I got this great shot of the other three one evening on the bus. Left to right, the Sibs, Colorado Cousin, Crazy Cousin.


This is me on the plane. It speaks for itself.

We were having the professional photographers take our pictures everywhere, and I just ordered a download of the best one, which I'll post tomorrow, probably.

So, home. I finally got to go into the city and visit OldFriend today, which was wonderful. K had another interview this morning, and I think is now starting to get very depressed. Maybe she'll have good news by the end of the week, but she doesn't think so, and she's been pretty optimistic up to this point. My heart is breaking for her.

Tomorrow, I need to go into school and get some things done. Our first day is next Tuesday; the kids' first day is the day after that. I still have no idea how many people will be on the library staff this year, or who they are, or if I have a lunch period in my day. I'm going to try to speak to the principal in the morning, but I don't expect much to come out of it, even if he's willing to see me.

And so on. I have so much to do this week, I don't know how I'll fit it all in. But I suppose I will, somehow.



watching FAMILY GUY :: ENTRY #2109
READING: --- by ---

Quick Post

We are having a totally faboo trip, but we are exhausted beyond belief. Internet service has been very spotty. Food is very good, plenty of it, and FREE! Magic Kingdom tomorrow.


-- Post From My iPhone

Newark Airport

We're here, on time, after a couple of false starts. Now for some coffee. Boarding in about a half hour.

-- Post From My iPhone

I Got Shpilkes

Shpilkes is best described as "having ants in the pants." Can't sit still.

I am so good at getting everything ready for a trip ahead of time that I had absolutely nothing to do today, but I didn't really have the patience to sit and read. I did nap for a little bit, I think, but otherwise, I have no idea what I've been doing all day. Unfortunately, my sister prepares for a trip by growing more and more anxious, and she's still packing now. (It's nearly 7:30 pm.) Ah well.

What else can I tell you? I know there was something else. I didn't sleep last night; I was up making new ringtones at 2:30 because I thought of a song I wanted as a ringtone and didn't have, and then I realized what the hell, I was awake anyway, so I got up and did it.

Let's just say I do not really travel easily. (Although that's not really connected to the sleep thing, that's just me.) I think the reason I go so overboard in preparing is that it's my way of dealing with the discomfort of being away from home and all that. I'm certainly happy about where I'm going, and I could certainly use some time away. But I am a very home-oriented person; I like being in my own space with all my stuff around me. Traveling is an anxious kind of activity for me. Also, I think that the Sibs and I are going to be less compatible roommates than we used to be years ago when we traveled more together, but that could just be the anxiety talking.

Anyway.

I am going to DISNEY WORLD tomorrow morning and we are going to have a WONDERFUL time and I will post pictures when I can and entries as well.




watching something :: ENTRY #2106
READING: The Coffee Trader by David Liss

Aging Gracefully. *ahem*

First, I posted earlier today, a picture and a short post from the phone. When I post from the phone, as I'll be doing next week, it's not easy to send out the mailing list email, so I won't be doing that. I'm just saying.

Last night over dinner, K and I had an interesting conversation about my health issues in general, and related things. I don't like to feel as if my health issues are taking up everybody's attention, and so I rarely call attention to them myself unless I feel that I have to. I don't discuss them with people all the time (except you, and my sister.) In her later years, if someone said to my mother, "Hi, how are you?" she told them. "Well, I'm still very constipated, no better since yesterday," and so on. I do not want to be that person.

As a result, the kids have sort of gotten this impression that my sister and I are not really impaired significantly, but that we will be so when it's convenient for us, say, to board the plane early, or to avoid the lines at the parks. First, I find this insulting, and I would think they would know better, but I explained that this is not the case. I told her that if she sees me walking with a cane, it's a safe bet that I should have been using it for two weeks already.

I think she did develop a better sense of where I am physically after we talked, and now she's more concerned about me taking proper care of myself, which is nice, but also not the kind of attention I would want, which is why I keep things quiet. I'm not that old; I don't need my kids to start asking me if I've taken my meds, and why aren't I using my cane? I guess there's a balance here we need to achieve.

I also reminded her that I, much more than she, have a good understanding of the needs of people who are more disabled than I. I have mentioned before, but not for a long time, that my father's business partner for 50 years was among the final group of polio victims. I was six months old when he became ill, and he did not walk after that. He was like an uncle to me, and the term "wheelchair accessible" did not exist then. There were no ramps, except the one on their office that they put there themselves. Handicapped parking? The local police put up signs outside their office door warning everybody else not to park there, that's it. Bottom line, I am sensitive to these needs in other people, and would not abuse them.

Which is not to say that I would not use accommodations to which I am entitled and which I need. I don't think I can wait on an hour-long line with Crohn's; I'd have to leave every fifteen minutes to find a bathroom, and I'd never get to the front of the line!

Anyway, the only thing I've thought about is that our two cousins would get a look at us with our arthritis and cane and whatever and think we were a million years old or something. But Colorado cousin just called a while ago; among other things, she apologetically told me that she has severe tendinitis -- ankle -- and her doctor has her wearing a boot for awhile. So it's all of us. (I won't even go into her sister's issues at the moment.)




watching ALADDIN :: ENTRY #2105
READING: --- by ---

I Have Awesome Toes!

See? I have Mickey Mouse colored toes! The Korean ladies at the nail salon got a real chuckle out of this, let me tell you.

-- Post From My iPhone

Normal Is What's Normal For You

Or in this case, me. This is the way I am. I have other fine qualities.

My sister and her husband went to Massachusetts yesterday for an overnight visit with his married daughter, her hubs, and their baby. Here's our texted conversation from last night:

She: howdy ... the others are playing monopoly & i'm texting & knitting ... do you realize that i haven't packed 1 thing for our trip ... sat & sun i guess.

I: I am TOTALLY packed. I could leave in five minutes.

She: you suck

Heh heh.

I am getting a little antsy, I guess. I have left numbers on the fridge for the plumber, the car mechanic, the A/C people. Tomorrow I have laundry to do and dry cleaning to pick up. I called the hotel this morning and we have the rooms we asked for: two adjoining rooms, first floor, near the main building.

I also got my school-is-starting-soon mail from the high school. It has the opening week's schedule and a few other items. It also lists all the new staff members. Not that many this year, but out of seven, four are former students. There is no one listed for Social Studies; it says TBA for To be Announced. So they're clearly not opposed to hiring former students; shall we make it five? I don't really think so; she would have heard by now. It's unbelievable to me that she hasn't gotten a job, you know. Even speaking objectively, as much as I can, I can see that she's the kind of teacher a school would want. I had thought that she interviewed well, but maybe not, I don't know. I do know that some school some day is going to be thrilled that she was available for them. I just wish it was today.

And that's my day. Pedi tomorrow (I'll post pictures of that) and a visit from R.




watching PROJECT RUNWAY :: ENTRY #2103
READING: --- by ---

Okay, So ...

so I didn't post again yesterday. I've been sleeping strangely, even for me, and I was sooo tired.

Did I mention the other day that when I saw Dr. Resnick he said to continue my current routine for another three months, and the best way to get the *ahem* stuff through airport security was by packing it in my luggage. (This is a flat box which contains a foil pouch which holds your basic week's worth of little pre-filled enema bottles on a plastic tray.) Uh ... right. I did not reveal to him, as I have to you, that I am packed packed packed, am not re-packing again, and anyway, there's no room in there for that. Or in my carry-on, for that matter. So I will be using that extra back-sack. Will they confiscate my *ahem* items? We'll see. If they do, I'll either get the prescription filled in Florida, or do without. It won't kill me. But I don't expect a problem at security, although there may be a laugh or two. And yes, my carry-on is fully packed now, too, all except my wallet and the my phone and charger.

Not much today, except a long nap, which left me feeling achy and headachy. The arthritis is very annoying, and I don't yet have a reasonable plan of attack for it. There may be none. It's at its worst when I first wake up, although it did keep me awake for a few hours last night. It's my arms that hurt, mostly my elbows, and hands. Something else to deal with.

I had found some slides in among my mother's pictures. We were never slide takers or showers, so I don't know who took these, but I want to scan them, too, and boy, that is not easy these days. I tried a whole variety of approaches last night, and finally one that worked, a little -- I used my phone as a light box and took pictures with my camera in macro mode -- and then today, a coupon came, of all things, and it turns out they do it at Costco. So I'll go there one day after my trip. Some of these are pictures from my sister's wedding. There's one of me in a rocking chair with my sister's baby twins on my lap, which is something I did nearly every day after school for their first year or two, stop there on my way home and rock them and sing to them to give my sister a break. (My father would come by and take over so I could go home and make dinner. I was just married, remember.) And I think there's a picture or two of my college boyfriend. That should be interesting, because I ripped all his pictures out of my college photo album long, long ago. Not that I don't remember what he looked like -- think Joe Dirt, but not blond, mullet not quite that long -- but I'm sure my kids will get a chuckle out of it. As will you.





watching THE GOLDEN GIRLS :: ENTRY #2102
READING: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

Got To Play With a New Toy

Yesterday, K and I saw so many commercials for Big Lots, and an inexpensive camcorder they were selling, that we had to get get us some. There's only one Big Lots remotely near us, and it's the kind of place that when you walk in, you feel like you need to take a shower. Anyway, we got them and came home, and I've been itching to try it out. It is easy to use. (It's got one of those little bump-out USB connectors.) I took a dark little sample movie and put it up on YouTube (and then took it down), just to see how it works. It works.

Here's the sample I just made for you guys. It's not much, just me walking around the front lawn. (I'm not in it, only my voice.) Now to see how well it uploads here. I expect to write a real entry later on.





watching WILL AND GRACE :: ENTRY #2102
READING: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

Looking ... Up?

Okay, so here's where today stands:

I went to the cardiologist this morning for an annual visit, and all seems fine to him, although he wants me to have another stress test. (Two years since the first one.) I made the appointment for September 28, which, for the faithful, is Yom Kippur, but since I'm not one of the faithful, it's a day off work, so I don't have to take a working day off to go. I expect no issues to surface. He asked me if I exercise, but said nothing about weight, which is part of what makes him such a nice doctor.

I have a firm date to go in and visit OldFriend, which is the Monday after I get back from Disney World. I'm taking the train this time, and K will maybe go with me and maybe not, depending.

Last night, she got an email to set up an interview that would have been a real blow not to get. Will she get the job? Anything is possible, so she might. If she doesn't, well, I'm just really, really glad she got the interview. More on that in the future, depending on what comes of it. In the meantime, she sent in yet another application today to yet another school district.

We've had this little mini-drama going on, my sister and I, over this big box of pictures that I got from Wonderful Niece, but today, I talked to WN and everything is peaceful and serene. I get the feeling that my sister was reading more into something than was there, and as a result, was making me a little crazy, but WN assures me that all is well, and that my feeling -- that the pictures belong to all of us, she's just their keeper for now -- is exactly the way she feels. Good.

Reading. I cannot make myself finish that damn book, even though I really want to read it. I have at least a half dozen ready to go on the iPhone, but I'm trying not to dig into those at least until we're in the air next week. (I don't want to read them all and then have nothing with me when I'm away.)

Away. One week from this very moment, I will be dining at Cap'n Jack's at Disney's Marketplace, or whatever they call that little mall they have there. We're not going to the part where they have the nightclubs and such because we are, after all, four old bats, crazy perhaps, but hardly wild. We'd rather go shopping. Which we will, before and after dinner, I'd guess. Our flight and our cousins' flight from Denver arrive about a half hour apart next Monday afternoon (theoretically), so we should be at the hotel by three or three-thirty, I think.

Speaking of which, I believe I am fully packed now. Yeah, yeah, no one here believes it, either. But I think the suitcase is good. Stuffed, but good. I have a short list of what is yet to go in the carry-on, which is already stuffed as well, so I may have to carry some medication in one of those draw-string back-sacks, or whatever they're called. (It's school colors, and has the team name in huge letters across the front. These days, aren't all of us whose school name isn't Trojans thankful for that small favor? Our school name makes no particular sense, but it is funny, in a way that took me 35 years to get, which I'll happily explain to you all when I retire.)

The Hubs is now cooking an entire head of cauliflower using some method that is going to make me start sneezing uncontrollably in a matter of minutes. Time to post.




watching FAMILY GUY :: ENTRY #2101
READING: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

For Poola

watching --- :: ENTRY #2100
READING: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

Testing

Trying a post with a new iPhone app to see if I can post pictures.

Lookin' good!


-- Post From My iPhone

Saturday

We had a nice visit from R today. We went out for lunch and then she and K did some shopping. As for me ...

It has taken me literally years, but I finally got from Wonderful Niece the big box of all my mother's pictures and mementos and things. I knew that I would find the picture I wanted for those Disney World trinkets, even though I used another picture and made them already. But the picture I wanted was in there, and so today, I made us each a refrigerator magnet from this picture:


The shrinky-dink, of course, is darker and smaller. I believe this is the only photograph ever taken of the four of us cousins together, although I could be wrong; I just haven't ever seen any others. I am the little one in the front. This was taken when my mother and sister and I visited their family in California when I was seven.

I'm watching one of those awful TV shows about beauty pageants and little girls (and boys, in this one), and I think all these parents should have their children removed from their custody. This is a bizarre form of child abuse; I can't imagine these children grow up with psyches intact, unscarred.

So, I've scanned over 130 pictures and things since yesterday, and I'm taking a little break today. There was some amazing stuff in the box, including my birth announcement, a card announcing the engagement of my father's parents, and that grandmother's original passport (in Russian), which I had never seen before. No idea where that came from, but it was accompanied by notes in my mother's handwriting from when she had it translated once. Oh, and I'll leave you with this. It was a note also in my mother's handwriting; it looked like a rough draft of a letter she then re-wrote and sent, but I don't know to whom. There's no date on it. I'm using the real name in the letter because I probably have it wrong anyway, since my mother's handwriting is nearly undecipherable. Here's the transcription:

To whom it may concern:
During the 15 years that I have known Jeanette Kenn, I have never heard her say anything that might tend to identify her with Soviet Russia or Communistic sentiments.
I am strongly opposed to the dictatorship of Communistic Russia and all that it stands for. I would never want to associate with any persons who are disloyal to the U.S. and the [to] the best of my knowledge, Jeanette Kenn is a loyal American, who believes in the American way of life.
[Signed]

So I'm thinking early fifties, which means this was probably a friend from high school she was writing a reference for. Never saw this before either.




watching TODDLERS AND TIARAS :: ENTRY #2098
READING: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

Good News, Everybody!

It looks like I will not be going to debtor's prison this month instead of Disney World. It is very strange learning to live without two regular paychecks, one of which doesn't come during the summer. Unfortunately, that's the one we've got left at this point. As for the Hubs, I'm reminded of a friend years ago who would tell me from time to time that she wasn't going to spend money on something or other because "Billy's out of work," Billy, of course, being her husband. It was a long, long time before I came to realize that Bill was a very highly paid independent consultant of some sort, and if he had a week off between jobs, his very down-to-earth wife saw this as Billy being out of work for that week, even though he was going to be doing very well the week after. Anyway, the Hubs is basically getting his independent consulting business -- not in the same field as Billy -- off the ground, so he gets paid when he finishes a project, not every two weeks like before. As I say, it's a challenge. But today is a good day, so I'm okay.

There's been some drama at work, even though I'm not even working during the summer. Some of it has to do with the fact that those S.O.B.s did not call my kid in to interview for a job she is very qualified for. I am furious, hurt, and disappointed. In other school districts, people get hired because they have connections. Well, this is her connection, and it didn't work for her. Her grandfather was superintendent of the school system, for god's sake, but I guess that was too long ago to count, and my connection is meaningless. I wonder if someone is going to bother to explain this to me, or they're just going to pretend it didn't happen. I even emailed the supervisor in charge and the principal, asking for a courtesy interview, and got no answers back.

There's other crap going on too, but I won't even bother with that. I'm not getting angry over stupid things, only things that count, like my kid getting hurt.

We were supposed to visit my OldFriend in the city today, but the Sibs woke up with a migraine. I need to plan to see her the week after DW without my sister, just K and I will go in, or just me, if K, god willing, has gotten a job and needs every second to start planning. We were very disappointed that the visit didn't happen, but I'm going to make it happen next time. My sister doesn't have the summer restriction that I have, since she's retired, and her husband is happy to drive her into the city. I had wanted a girls' time visit anyway, so maybe this is all for the best.

Do I sound bummed? I'm not, I'm fine. Just a lot of crap flying around in the last couple of days. On the other hand, I am packed, except for the last minute things. Go me.




watching FRIENDS :: ENTRY #2097
READING: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

Meme.

This came from the empress. It's called The Truth Meme. (Sorry that the font came out so small. I don't know why that happens.)

1. Can you fill this out without lying? I don't see why not.
   
2. What was the last thing you put in your mouth? I think it was a mini-chocolate chip cookie.
   
3. Who was your last text message from? From K, the younger daughter.
   
4. Where was your default picture taken? Not sure what this means. Default? The one I show people to show them what I look like? Probably at someone's wedding within the last few years.
   
5. Last person you rode in a car with under the age of 20? There are no children anywhere at all in my family at this point. The last time was probably with my nephew Little K to a funeral a few years ago; he was probably about 16.
   
6. Name someone that made you laugh today? K. (Daughter, not nephew.)
   
7. How late did you stay up last night and why? I probably fell asleep last night around 3 a.m. That's just when I fell asleep.
   
8. If you could move somewhere else, would you? Maybe, if I won the lottery. I'd move to the town one town over, where my sister lives.
   
9. Ever been kissed under fireworks? I don't believe so. One of my very first dates with the Hubs right after high school was to see the July 4th fireworks, but there was no kiss until some time later.
   
10. Which of your FB friends lives closest to you? Hmm. Possibly my childhood next door neighbor, with whom I've recently re-established contact.
    
11. Do you believe exes can be friends? I have no personal experience with this one.
    
12. Calling or texting? Both, depending on the time and the situation.
    
13. How do you feel about Dr. Pepper? I like Dr. Pepper.
    
14. When was the last time you cried really hard? About a month ago. Maybe a little less.
    
15. Where is your biological father right now? His ashes are buried in the cemetery, in the same grave as my mother was buried (in the traditional fashion.)
    
16. Where are you at right now? At my desk in the family room.
    
17. Whose bed did you sleep in last night? I sleep on the couch in the family room every night. There's only room for one.
    
18. What was the last thing someone bought for you? I do not recall. A trinket of some kind -- gum or something -- from K, I would guess.
    
19. Who took your profile picture? The one on my Facebook page? (It's also on my blog page.) It's a sketch of me done by one of the other teachers at school.
    
20. Was yesterday better than today? Yes.
    
21. Can you live a day without TV? I always have the TV on, but I could certainly live without it.
    
22. Are you mad about anything? Yes.
    
23. Do you think relationships are really worth it? It would appear so.
    
24. When was the last time you were extremely disappointed and why? Last night, when I found out that K hadn't been called for an interview that she should have automatically gotten.
    
25. Are you a bad influence? I don't think so.
    
26. Night out or night in? I don't particularly enjoy being out at night.
    
27. What items could you not go without during the day? The basics: food, water. And lots of medication.
    
28. Would you share a drink with a stranger? I don't drink at all, so, no.
    
29. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? Ah. Can't think of anyone since my parents died.
    
30. What does the last text message in your inbox say? It says "Thanks".
    
31. How do you feel about your life right now? It's not such a great day, but in general, okay.
    
32. How many times have you been pulled over by the police? Four? Five? All of them for speeding, but I didn't get a ticket each time.
    
33. Do you hate anyone? I reserve hate for the biggies: Hitler, Pol Pot. But there are some people who have made me very sad today, and in whom I am very disappointed. (No one I'm related to.)
    
34. If we were to look in your inbox, what would we find? Emails regarding my various upcoming traveling plans, and a note from my friend the Chum, who is away for the summer.
    
35. Can you easily tell if someone's a fake? Probably not as well as I'd like to.
    
36. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass? Pass? Well, I haven't taken any illegal drugs, so I guess I would. But my blood would show a cornucopia of prescription medicines.
    
37. Has anyone ever called you perfect before? I highly doubt it.
    
38. What song is stuck in your head? "Lollipop, lollipop, oh, lolli lollipop"
    
39. Someone knocks on your window at 2 AM, who do you want it to be? An ambulance, becaue I'm having a heart attack if someone knocks on my window at 2 am.
    
40. Wanna have kids before you're 30? I had my first kid at 28, my second at 31.
    
41. Name something you have to do today. I had my nails done, and then went to Target.
    
42. Can you whistle? When I was a kid, I had a space between my two front teeth, and boy, could I whistle. But it was fixed when I was 12, so no whistling since then.
    
43. Do you sleep on your side, stomach, or back? Mostly on my back.
    
44. Do you think too much or too little? Waaaay too much.
    
45. Do you smile a lot? I think I smile a normal amount, but it probably doesn't look like I'm smiling to people around me because half my face is paralyzed. I actually only realized that this morning, that when I'm smiling, other people don't always know it.
    
46. Can you handle the truth? I hope so.
    
47. What was the last book you read? I just finished Hands of My Father, by Myron Uhlberg.
    
48. Is there something you always wear? I always have on my necklace and my wedding ring. Clothes? I almost always wear jeans, a tank or tee shirt, and a denim button down over that.
    
49. Honestly, who was the last person to tell you that they love you? K did, this morning.
    
50. Have you ever dyed your hair? I tried it for a year or two when the gray first started to show, but I gave it up. My hair is graying very nicely.
    
51. Are you wearing a necklace? Yes. I always wear a diamond circle pendant -- it looks like an engagement ring, with one bigger stone at one side -- that the Hubs gave me for our 30th anniversary.
    
52. What's something that can always make you feel better? Ah, let me think. Ice cream is always good. Thinking about happy childhood memories. Certain songs.
    
53. Will this weekend be a good one? God knows.
    
54. What do you want right now? Be less stressed.
    
55. Have you ever worn the opposite sex's clothing? Often. Men's shirts and pants sometimes fit me better.
    
56. Look behind you, what do you see? K, sitting on the couch, reading TV Guide.
    
57. Have you ever worked in a food place? No, and no one would want me to, either.
    
58. What would you name your future daughter? Aha! I already have two daughters, who already have names. If I had had a third daughter, I was partial to Amy.
    
59. What are your summer plans for 2009? Summer is half over, but I'm going to Disney World a week from Monday.
    
60. Does anyone know your FB password? No. I don't remember what it is either, but I have it written down.
    
61. Would you like some cake? Always. I would especially like some pie.
    
62. Did you lie in this quiz? I believe that I did not.
    

watching THE GILMORE GIRLS :: ENTRY #2096
READING: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers