Still Here

Holding on. My stomach is better, taking baby steps there, and I took less of the meds today, so my head is clearer. My other ailments are not improving (although the stye in my eye is gone), so they need time. If that means home again on Monday, so be it. I cant do what I need to treat the various other irritations when I'm in school; I can't even sit upright in a chair for that long. So we'll see.

And anyway, the Hubs' car, which is really my father's old car, somehow died this morning and is now in the shop. Perhaps nothing serious, but again, we'll see. My choices for Monday are to drive him to work before I go in, if I go, or to stay home and have him just take my car. So far, door #2 is looking much better to me all around.

In the meantime, the tree is up, standing in the middle of the living room, but not lit or decorated yet. R, still temporarily catless, is spending the weekend here, so we'll get to the tree sometime before she goes home. Her cat has had the worst reaction ever to being neutered, has been allergic to stitches, developed infections, so forth, but is essentially okay. The vet has vowed to keep her at his clinic until she's 100% and do whatever she needs, all at no cost to R. So, a good guy. She figures she'll make a nice donation to his animal rescue program when it's all done. In the meantime, she goes to visit every other day or so and take Trillian out to play and cuddle.

And time to go back to my couch.

WATCHING TV LAND :: ENTRY #1648

Where Did the Weekend Go?

Well, I got stuff done, I guess.

K stayed over at R's Friday night to look after the cat and get to her Saturday morning class without waking up so early (R is away for the weekend), and took my car, since the A/C in hers is dead and it's been a million degrees here everyday. Okay, high 80s, which is extremely unusual for this part of the world at this time of year. No real end in sight, either, although we expect rain later this week and possibly, just possibly, the high 70s, which is still too damn hot for October. Very few of our trees have started to turn color. It's weird.

So I ran an errand or two in her car yesterday morning -- it was hot -- including a brief Ikea run, only to find out that the DVD storage tower I need a third one of is discontinued. Bummer. I got a different one later in the day at Best Buy, a cheaper one, which I guess is okay. I have a serious shortage of space here in the Mouse House.

My laundry is done, but not put away. After dinner last night, I went back with K to feed the kitty, as we did this morning. She's sleeping over there again tonight, and R will be back mid-day tomorrow. She's an exceptionally adorable kitty, very hyper, and not too sure about anyone except R, although she'll cuddle with K if she's there long enough by herself. Me, not so much.

After kitty-feeding, we made the Sunday trip to Target, of course, and then came home and watched more of The War. I think I've finally seen it all. Anyway, I put all the episodes on DVDs and cleared them out of the DVR. I'm about warred out for now.

I also organized the beginnings of my Disney packing. I bought a carton and am putting some stuff in there, as well as gathering other stuff to pack. I don't need to pack clothes until a day or two before I go, but I like to have all the other stuff in one place, and I'll need to ship the box about a week before. My luggage is not large, which makes it easier to carry, but it means it will pretty much just hold clothes, so I'll ship all the other stuff, and ship a box home, too. Why not ship everything ahead of time? I don't know; it sounds like a brilliant idea to me, but I guess it just isn't done. I've never heard of anyone doing it, anyway.

Oh, and when I was looking for the airplane adapter for my headphones, I found what seems to be a working Mickey Mouse wristwatch, which I didn't know I had. It needs a battery and a link removed from the band, but I can get that done tomorrow, maybe, after the mason leaves.

I've got a mason -- not like from the secret society, but a man who knows how to use mortar and tools -- coming to look at our front porch, which is breaking. It's only about six years old; I had the man who installed it come and look in June, which I may have mentioned. He said it was cracking because the guy who put in the railings did it wrong, but that he could repair it and it would only be a couple hundred bucks. Which was hunky dory with me, except he never came back to do it. I haven't called back, because frankly, he looked like he was at death's door when he was here and I don't want to call and have his wife tell me he's dead. I called a more local guy to come look at it, and hopefully, that will be fine. It needs to be fixed before winter, or the whole porch/rail/post/overhang combination could just crumble and collapse. The guy is coming after school tomorrow to give me an estimate.

Oh, here's big news for me. It was hot today when we went out, so I pulled my hair back in a ponytail. You can't imagine how long it is since I've been able to do that, maybe 15 - 20 years? It's a little scrawny ponytail that I pulled out through the hole in the back of my baseball cap, but still. It kept the hair off my neck, and it was nice having the option.

Okay, folks. Time to make some iced tea and start getting myself together for tomorrow.

WATCHING E! :: ENTRY #1599

Catching Up

So we went to the Polish wedding last night, which I mention by its ethnicity because this was an extremely ethnic affair, in many ways. Among other things, the host/emcee/DJ (whatever he was) kept referring to "our guests" and "our American friends," aka, the groom's work friends, of which the Hubs and I were two.

You may recall that we already went to a wedding for this same couple, about a year and a half ago. They got married the day after she arrived from Poland because she came on a bride's visa -- the groom is Polish born, but has been here since he was a child, and is a long-time citizen -- but they still wanted the church wedding and big reception, so it took until now to have that. Her parents and other family not already here came from Poland.

The toasts were in Polish, although the music was a real mix of Polish and American music, as were the dances. The food was not especially ethnic (as it was at the first wedding), but this was new to me: instead of pitchers of beer on the tables, which I've seen before (but not at Jewish weddings), there were unopened bottles of Johnny Walker Red and vodka. (I forget the brand, a good one, but not a Polish vodka.) And an open bar, which is nice at a wedding. (I went to a wedding once where the groom was Italian and the bride from a strict Lutheran sect, and one half of the room was happily buzzed while the other half sat straight up in their chairs, no dancing and certainly no drinking. And no open bar, for sure. It was a strange one.)

Anyway, I hate the noise of a loud party like that, and I hate the shoes I have to wear, but otherwise it was a very nice wedding, and the company at our table was also pleasant. The groom is just a delightful young man, and his bride beautiful and in a gorgeous gown. She spoke almost no English when I last met her, but was pretty fluent last night, also a lovely girl.

Which is why I never got to write last night.

I had also spent Saturday morning with R -- K was at class, and was also tutoring as part of that class -- so we did some looking around for new DVD shelves that she needs, and went to a very nice farmers' market in her town, and out for lunch. I also wanted to commune with the grandcat, but holy cow, that kitty did not stand still for two seconds! She backed away when I approached her, and I wasn't sitting long enough for her to get curious and climb all over me, but she also had a toy mouse that she continually batted back and forth and chased. She is incredibly cute, and has a lovely little personality for a kitty.

I got stuff done around the house today, including opening all the windows and airing things out, because it was just beautiful here today, a perfect day. I finished what was leftover to be done from Friday's workshop, I obsessed over DisneyWorld happily, I got my laundry put away, and then I watched a whole lot of last season's Heroes in anticipation of tomorrow's night second season opener.

And ... back to work tomorrow.

WATCHING REBA :: ENTRY #1588

Moving Right Along

Meet the grandcat:



Okay, so work is work, which is why it's called work and not play, and that's about it. I did speak to the freshmen this morning, and I was very silly. There's going to be a pep rally on Friday, and there's a particular cheer that's done at every damn pep rally, which is called, oddly enough, the "Hey, Freshmen!" cheer. The first time it's done, the cheerleaders begin by facing the freshman class in the bleachers and cheering, in a prompting tone, "HEY FRESHMEN!" and the freshmen have no clue what to do. This is repeated a couple of times to a tune, at which point the cheerleaders turn to the sophomore class and cheer "HEY SOPHOMORES!" and every sophomore shouts back "SOPHOMORES!" and so on, until the senior class response brings down the house.

So this morning, when the principal said, "And now our librarian, Mrs. Chai, has a few things to tell you," I took the microphone and yelled into it "HEY FRESHMEN!" and of course they did nothing because they've never heard it before. At this point, I turned in mock horror to the student activities coordinator (who knew I was doig this) and said "Oh, Miss X -- they don't know! We have to show them what to do!" So I explained that when someone yells at them "HEY FRESHMEN!" they have to yell back "FRESHMEN!" as loud as they can, and I got them to do it a few times. Heh heh. I won't go to the pep rally on Friday, god forbid, but I'm sure I'll get a report back on how they did.

My hair is longer than it's been in many a year, and I've gotten at least a dozen compliments on it since yesterday. Of course, I'm getting it cut tomorrow, but not drastically; it's just time for a trim.

In the meantime, I've got my work calendar to put together tonight. I'm using what we call at school "the planner", which is a datebook/agenda thing that all the kids get each year. I've never done it this way before, but I'll give it a shot. I've never really found a computer calendar that fits the school day and year, and I'm not in the mood to fill in a year's worth of dates on an Excel sheet -- okay, it's 40 sheets in one workbook -- which is what I do every year.

K is off at her first night of classes, although she had to go in early this morning and cover a class for one of the professors she's assisting this semester. Hey, gotta do something to earn that money!

WATCHING ELLEN :: ENTRY #1574

And a Meme, Too

But first, the arrival yesterday of the grandcat. After waiting months and trying to decide when would be the best possible time to get herself a cat, yesterday morning R woke up, went to the shelter near her house, and came home with a cat. She's four months old, black and gray, and has been named Trillian. I'll post a picture when she comes out from under the bed long enough for someone to take one. She is very cute, and doesn't seem skittish or scared. It looks like she just really likes it under the bed. She'll adjust.

I slept weird again last night, doing the hot/cold thing all night long, and woke up at 5.45, 15 minutes before the alarm. School was, what can I say? It was school. I'll be starting my 32nd year in February. For the most part, things never change.

The only different thing this year seems to be that our custodial staff, all of whom are generally terrific, have somehow dropped the ball this summer. My library was a mess, and I know a lot of the classrooms were, too. Not that they were dirty. The problem was that they moved everything around to clean and didn't put anything back. They didn't move some other heavy things I had asked them in June to do. When I got in, the little sofa and the four armchairs were upside down on top of bookstacks. They came and moved them, but they wouldn't have unless I'd asked. That's just weird. And they also seem to have pulled all plugs out of outlets, for what reason I do not know, and now the computer at the circulation desk will not turn on.

I'm going to be very busy tomorrow.

---

And now, a meme. I got it from The Cranky One, but I think I saw it at Rednose as well.

1) How old do you wish you were?

I used to say that my "identity age," the age I feel myself to be, was 19. I had a good year at 19. But right now? I'm going to go with 58. I think I'll be able to retire that year.

2) Where were you when 9/11 happened?

I was in school, in the library, with a class. Our secretary's son called her on the phone from North Carolina and told us to turn on the library TV because a plane had hit the World Trade Center, and I turned it on. We saw the second plane hit and both towers go down. Meanwhile, kids in our school had parents working in those buildings.

3) What do you do when vending machines steal your money?

Hasn't happened to me in so long that I don't remember. Smack it? Kick it?

4) Do you consider yourself kind?

Yes.

5) If you HAD to get a tattoo, where would it be?

You mean a third one? If I knew that, I'd have it already. I have two small ones, each about the size of a quarter. One inside my left wrist where I can see it all the time, and one inside on my right ankle.

6) If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?

Two languages. I'm sorry I didn't learn to speak Yiddish when I had the chance as a child, but at that point, they were all trying to make each next generation more American. (And I was obnoxious to them when they spoke Yiddish to each other, so no one was rushing to teach it to me.) And French. I love French and the way it sounds. It was one of my best subjects in school.

7) Do you know your neighbors?

Eh ... not so much. The ones on the left are very, very nice and we say hello, but they speak very little English. On the right, they do not acknowledge us, although the husband came over to me once in the driveway out of the blue, never spoke to me before, and asked if we were out of power in our house. He seemed nice. People across the street -- can't get a fix on them.

8) What do you consider a vacation/holiday?

There's a vacation and there's a trip. A vacation to me just means not having to go to work, taking things easy and at my own pace. A trip is going somewhere special, not always relaxing. If I'm going on a trip, I want it to be DisneyWorld. I come home and need a vacation.

9) Do you follow your horoscope?

I have never bought into that stuff for five minutes.

10) Are you touchy feely?

Hmm, good question. I think I am, but I'm surrounded by people who aren't, which makes it hard. You can't be just the one touchy-feely person in the room.

11) Do you believe that opposites attract?

Yes. And so do non-opposites. Attraction has many facets and causes.

12) Dream job?

Can't imagine at this point. Something where there is NO politics involved and everybody is happy. I should be selling cotton candy on Main Street in the Magic Kingdom.

13) Favorite channel(s)?

I watch a lot of Lifetime and the History Channel, but the TV is on here all the time, so I catch a lot of them here and there. I'll go wherever Law and Order and L & O: SVU are.

15) Favorite place to go on weekends?

Target.

16) Showers or Baths?

I was very happy when I outgrew the need to take baths and could start taking showers. I will only actually sit in a tub once every five years or so. It does not generally appeal to me. It's boring.

17) Do you paint your nails?

No actual paint involved, but I get my nails done every other week, and my toes -- okay, polish there -- every three weeks. I get a gel manicure, which is the only thing I've ever found that keeps my nails strong so they don't bend and chip and break. It looks like a French manicure.

18) Do you trust people easily?

I generally do. Not that this is a good thing.

19) What are your phobias?

Snakes, of course, is the big one. But I have an unnatural fear that every time a family member strays from home, it will end in a phone call from the state troopers. Gotta work on that one.

20) Do you want kids?

Only the two I have, thanks.

21) Do you keep a handwritten journal?

Heavens no. Writing by hand for any length of time cramps up my hand and makes it useless. When I was a kid, I would write books, and do them all by hand in composition books or on legal pads.

22) Where would you rather be right now?

Asleep.

24) Heavy or light sleeper?

Very light sleeper. If the person in bed next to me -- that would be the Hubs -- moves, I wake up.

25) Are you paranoid?

See question 19. I'm as nutty as a fruitcake.

26) Are you impatient?

Sometimes, but mostly no. But very much so when I'm waiting for someone to come home and I think they're late.

27) Who can you relate to?

A lot of people whose diaries I read. Shy kids I see in classes at school.

28) What's your main ringtone on your cell?

My cell phone ring sounds like a normal telephone ring, like a phone in your house would sound.

29) What were you doing at midnight last night?

Sleeping.

30) What did the last text on your mobile phone say?

No idea when I last got a text message. It's not something I do well.

31) Name 3 things you have on you at all times.

When I leave the house, I presume. Wallet, keys, cellphone. And hearing aids and glasses, of course.

32) How much money do you have on you?

I'm in my pajamas at the moment, so, none. In my wallet, enough for lunch tomorrow.

33) What is your favorite part of the chicken?

Dark meat.

34) What's your favorite town/city?

Very tough one. I can't think of anyplace that I've thought "I really want to live here!" Visiting? I don't know. I liked Cardiff, Wales a lot.

35) Who got you to start an online journal?

It's a long story that I wrote about right after I started, but it was when I found a diary kept by a girl in my school.

36) What did you have for dinner last night?

I had this amazing Chilean Sea Bass, left over from dinner with the ILs the night before.

37) How tall are you barefoot?

About 5' 2", plus a skoosh more. I'm losing the skoosh.

38) What do you prefer to drink in the morning?

Decaf, black, with two Sweet'n'low.

39) Do you have A.D.D.?

I think it's one of the few things I can safely say I don't have. But I'm leaning towards OCD; does that count for anything?

40) Favorite place to be?

Other than DisneyWorld, at home, in the family room.

41) Where would you like to travel?

I've been to England and Wales twice; I'd like to see Scotland and Ireland. Maybe Disneyland Paris. And much more than the tiny bits of Canada I've seen. If they weren't so far away (as in, too much time in a plane), Australia and New Zealand. Anyone see a pattern here?

42) Where do you think you'll be in 10 yrs?

Retired, god willing, and being a grandma would be nice.

43) What songs do you sing in the shower?

I don't think I do that anymore. I'll listen tomorrow morning and let you know.

44) Worst injury you've ever had.

Probably the time I fell and the Bible man picked me up. I didn't break a bone, but I had a bruise from my knee to my hip, and I was on crutches for a couple of weeks.

45) What is your favorite candy?

Smarties.

46) What song is stuck in your head?

Nothing at the moment. I' was very immersed in iTunes for the last couple of days, cleaning it up and tweaking it here and there, and I feel like I'm drowning in all the music I have. Oh, okay. "I've Got My Mind Set on You" by George Harrison.

WATCHING REBA :: ENTRY #1574

The Next Day

So it goes. Yesterday was, of course, very stressful. We had come to realize by mid-afternoon on Sunday that sweet Boo had entered a decline, and for us to make him continue to endure it would be cruel. He weighed just over 3 pounds, and had not eaten more than a teaspoon's worth of baby food in days. And so it was.

It is strange to live here without a cat, although I grew up without animals, and so I was used to it at one time, and for a long time. I almost hadn't realized how many adjustments we had made here to living with elderly, ill animals, but even yesterday afternoon, I took the towels off the furniture and began the rest of the cleaning that I would have to do. Today, I took down the living room curtains to wash them -- Boo would brush against the edge as he slipped past to take his place on the window-ledge -- but then I saw that they were dry-clean only, and since they were cheap to begin with, I went out and got replacements for probably less than the dry-cleaning would cost.

You know, my motivation to "de-cat" the house is a strange one, which I'm sure I've mentioned before. My sister's husband is intensely allergic to cats, which means that not only can he not enter my house, my sister won't, either. Well, she will now, I guess. She has said that if she comes into my house, she has to wash her hair when she gets home or her husband will react to the cats when he hugs her. Hmmm. I'm going to assume this is true; I certainly saw his intense reaction the one time he did come into my house and said, gasping and with red, swollen eyes after about two minutes "Do you have cats?" So I know his allergy is real, I just don't know how real it is second-hand. And of course, all their grown and out of the house children have cats, including the one who is the provider of the so-far only grandchild. Does he visit there? Of course he does. Does he react? Well, yes, I believe he does that, too, although they make some adjustments or other to help him out.

Anyway, I have vacuumed like mad, changed or cleaned the curtains and the slipcovers, washed the washable floors, thrown out two pillows on the couch that I could not remove the cat-hair from, and ... what else? I don't know. My house looks very clean, as long as you don't examine the tiles in the bathroom too closely, but that's not cat related.

My bedroom door is standing open now, as is the door at the base of the steps up to K's room. They were both closed before to limit the areas Boo would randomly poop in. We noticed last night while we were eating dinner that we could step away from the table for a moment without moving our food to some protected place that he wouldn't jump to. (The stove is the only place he never jumped to.) And so forth. Our lives are easier, but out hearts are heavier. It will take some time.

Those little beasts just get right under your skin. This is the only post I'm going to write about losing him and making those adjustments, so I'll go on for a tiny bit more. But no more after today.

It is their strength and their weakness, you know, that they get under your skin. It's their weakness because, under normal life conditions, they cannot outlive us, and this will break our hearts. It is their strength that we can come to love an animal so, almost as if they are people.

BooBoo was the cat that listened to my daughters' teenage angst, and the cat that curled up at my knees when I came home from the hospital after my brain surgery and I was too weak to walk around, so he stayed where I was. He was not generally a cat who curled up next to you, although he always curled up to R. She was 10 when he was born, one week after her 10th birthday, in fact.

Okay, I'm rambling, and I want to be done now. I live in a cat-free house, and it is very strange. As much as I hoped that some day I would no longer be a slave to elderly, ill animals, I knew that I would be devastated when the time came to make that transition, and of course, I am. I didn't realize how much of the house was centered around them, and of me. My stomach is at peace today for the first time in a long time. Of course, there's nothing left after yesterday, but whatever.

Moving on. So it goes. Thank you all for your kind words.

WATCHING ELLEN :: ENTRY #1546

Sad Day Today

Goodbye, my little man.



See you on the other side.


WATCHING --- :: ENTRY #1545

Late, If Not Better

I wasn't going to write today, but here I am, and blah blah blah. It's been a long weekend of mostly having a variety of health issues, which I won't go into here in any detail because I still have some minimal sense of decorum. I may call someone for an appointment tomorrow, but frankly, I wouldn't even know who to call -- that's whom -- so I may just wait until Tuesday so that the cardiologist can tell me there's nothing wrong with my heart and I can say "Great, now who can you send me to for xx disgusting condition that I also have?" I could also see my new internist and list all my symptoms for her, top to toe, but she's either already on maternity leave or is going sometime this week, so she's busy, and you know, I changed to a woman doctor for a reason. (The other internist in the office is not. A woman, I mean. If I get the measles or some other disease of a non-delicate nature, I will happily see him til Dr. Mama comes back sometime in September.)

So I've done very little except a quick trip to the supermarket today, and otherwise, reading or watching TV. (And changing cat towels, of course, but he's had a good day today.) Listen to how psycho this cat is. He will not touch food that's been sitting out at all. Which means, if he didn't eat all of it the second I put it down (and he never does), he turns his nose up at what's left. So when he cries for food, I have to pick up the leftovers, clean off the dish, and put new food (from the same original can) down on it. Earlier today, as I was performing my ritual, a bit of the "old" food slipped onto the floor and he went after it like it was fresh caviar. He's such an OCD little weirdo.

I finished the Under the Banner of Heaven, which was quite good, although I suppose that evaluation would depend on whether or not the reader is him or herself a Mormon. Btw, I read it as an e-book, on my little Palm, because I wanted to try to read a whole book that way and see what it was like. (Which prompted K to say "But I gave you the book. It's right there." Two feet away from me, but yes, I was reading the ebook instead, which made it possible for R to borrow the real book before I'd finished it.) Anyway, I liked the reading experience very much. It's small, easy to hold, only requires one hand to hold it open, and best of all, has its own backlighting, so you can read in a dark room. Even so, K gave me another real book, along with a dirty look, so I started reading Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. I must be the last living person who's never read any Terry Pratchett. I picked up something once and didn't like it, so I never tried it again. But this is amusing, so far. Only I wanted to turn the lights out, so there you go.

Writing tomorrow will depend entirely on the state of my ailments, which provide various levels of discomfort throughout the day. Now, not to give anything away, primarily because no one wants to know, and I'm not limited here to just one ailment, because that would not convey the full sense of joy that it is to be me, but I will share with you a series of events from my childhood that are never far from my mind these days.

There were several television commercials for what was apparently a popular product. I saw these during the day, so it must have been times when grandma was looking after me and her stories were on. Each commercial featured a plain, dark background, and a pleasant but stern looking man standing in the center of the screen. Then he speaks and comes to life. In one commercial, he strikes a giant match and hold it up; it is about a foot long and burns at the top like a torch, and he says

"Stop the burning pain of hemorrhoids!"

Being six or so years old and having some minimal understanding of human anatomy, I think "What are hemorrhoids? I thought ...."

In the next commercial, same man, same stage, suddenly holds his hands out in front of him, palms spread about two feet apart, and says

"Shrink hemorrhoids with Preparation-H!" and he moves his hands closer together by about two inches on each side. and now I think

"OH GOD! WHAT ARE HEMORRHOIDS?"

Imagery is wasted on the impressionable young. Fear works, for sure, but imagery? Subtlety? Pssshhht.

WATCHING PBS :: ENTRY #1537

Shopped. Did Not Drop.

One of the hazards of summer vacation is never knowing what day of the week it is. This is compounded by there being nothing distinctive to watch on TV on any given night. *sigh* Thursday, right?

The Sibs and I outlet-shopped today; I got a silk blouse originally marked $68.00 for $11.00. Which is cool. I don't know if I wrote about this a month or two ago: a conversation I had with the Chum about bargain vs. non-bargain shopping. She said that her mother refused to bargain shop. If she bought something for less than its full retail price, she was sure that there was something wrong with it. I would imagine it was also a badge of honor for her that she could afford to pay full retail price for anything she wanted. I hope they never sent her out to buy a car by herself, which I doubt they did. Anyway, for me, and certainly my mother before me, shopping is a sport, and bargain shopping is what makes it fun. It's part of the game, no? And why spend more for something when you can get it for less? That way, you can buy more stuff.

Ahem.

In other news, K is out on a date again tonight, so, YAY! The transportation arrangements are making me a little nervous, so I guess I'll stay up until she gets home, which should be around midnight. Oy. Why didn't they both just marry high school sweethearts so I could never worry about this stuff? Oh, right, K didn't have one and R's turned out to be a psycho-stalker. Right. Way better not married to that one.

What else can I tell you? The Sibs has offered to go with me to my stress test next Tuesday, which is a good thing. Not that I think I couldn't have gone alone (or they would have told me to bring a driver), but it'll be nice to have her there. She was with me when I was told about my brain tumor lo these many years. So she's not exactly a good luck charm, but remains a good support. I'm thinking now that maybe I'm going to be told to see the pulmonologist (the lung guy) and I'll have to start taking some asthma medication. Because what I need in my life is more medication. *sigh* Oh, I've been on the lower dose of estrogen for about 5 days and I haven't killed anyone yet, so that's a good thing. I need a little counter for my page here that counts the number of days I've gone without hurting anyone. heh heh.

Oh, so when the Hubs came home yesterday, he said hello and went on into the other room to drop off his stuff, and then came right back and said "Did you forget to tell me something? Oh, there's the cat!" Because his first thought, when he saw the new rugs, was that the cat must be dead, or I wouldn't have gotten them. I assured him of both the cat's continued existence, the extreme grossness of the old rugs, and the extreme cheapness of the new ones. And anyway, this cat doesn't pee on the rugs, as the other one did, and he prefers to poop on the furniture rather than the floor. (How lucky for me.) Speaking of which, time to put a load of cat towels in the dryer.

WATCHING UGLY BETTY :: ENTRY #1535

It's Just Today

This is the article I mentioned yesterday; it is very much worth reading. It's not from some oddball source, either; it's in The New York Times. (If it asks you for a username/password, you can register -- it's free -- or use library/library.)

I just posted another entry, a rant of sorts triggered by last night's presidential debate. But I thought I'd write a bit about real life as well. Not that it's all that exciting.

I really don't feel great, and haven't all summer. I won't go into the details, which are totally TMI, but some of it is the same old stuff, and some of it is the same less-old stuff, like my back hurting (I'm going to the chiropractor, like a good girl), and I think I'm starting to nervous up over next week's stress test. Even so, I'm pretty well convinced that there's nothing wrong with my heart. I'm thinking it's probably respiratory, since I can't walk up my basement steps without huffing and puffing. I'm going on Tuesday, and I figure a cardiologist can watch me take the test and will know at one point if he has to say "Hey lady, you need a pulmonologist," and there's one in the same office there, too. And then I'll stop by the gastro man on my way out. I've been taking the meds he gave me back in April, which are supposed to make me drowsy (which is why I don't take them more), but I need to go another day or two to see if there's improvement.

On another front, Boo the cat is doing pretty well, but let me tell you: he stinks to high heaven. He can no longer clean himself properly, and he squirms away if we try to clean him so we can only get a little section at a time. I'm reluctant to grab him and hold him tight because he probably weighs only four pounds at this point, maybe a bit more, and is all bones, so I'm literally afraid that I'll break him. He never sits or sleeps on the actual furniture, because everything is covered with towels, which I change all day, as necessary, but the smell is starting to get to me a bit. Poor little guy, it can't be nice for him, either. Gotta try again when he wakes up.

So I did cut down my estrogen, starting Saturday, and I think that's accounting for some of the tension I'm feeling, since there's no real reason for it. I've been sleeping okay so far, but I guess that could change. It takes forever for me to wake up in the morning, and I'm dragging all day long. I did manage to straighten up the living room today and make a trip to recycling, but actually clean? I'll think about it tomorrow, Scarlet.

I thought I had more to write, but my head is totally not clear. Maybe a bit later, if I can think straight.

UPDATE: Lest you think I am ignoring my baby, as soon as I posted, I gave him a nice warm sponge-bath with a soft washcloth, trimmed off a lot of yucky fur places, and washed him all over with nice-smelling cat wipes and gave him a good combing. Part of his problem is that he loves to be groomed so much that he writhes in pleasure and won't hold still, so everyplace is hard to reach. And I changed the towels again, too.

WATCHING DR. PHIL :: ENTRY #1533

And ... Done.

Finished. And no more details from me, at least not about the book.

We got our books at 12.15 last night this morning, which was pretty good. The "party" was more like a happy crowd in a bookstore; we spent most of it sitting in the cafe with the Other Chai. Once we had our books, we were on our way, and were home about 12:40. I changed, got comfortable, settled in on the couch, and said

"Eeuuw. What is that smell?"

It was cat shit, of course, which was liberally sprinkled over the half dozen or so towels spread out over the furniture in the family room for this very purpose. So I put my book down, picked up the icky towels, put down clean ones, and put the icky towels in the wash. Sat down again, all cozy, and said

"Eeuuw. What is that smell?"

Only to realize that it was all over the cat as well. Put down the book, reached for the wipes and the cat, and went to work. Poor Boo. Poor me.

I started reading at 1.00 and read until 4.00, but was getting up from time to time to put towels in the dryer, put more towels in the wash, etc. etc. Not a good night for Boo. And I was up and down myself, only I have the sense to go to the appropriate room and not on towels on the furniture (as one would hope.) But really, for the four hours that I was awake and reading, the bathroom was the busiest room in the house, and not just for me. I never knew there was that much night-time activity going on here.

At four, I put the book down and fell asleep on the couch. I approached consciousness around 5.30, but willed myself back to sleep. I was up, washed, and armed with coffee when I started reading again at eight. K slept until 10 -- she had also dropped off to sleep at four -- and we finished our books within an hour of each other early in the afternoon.

Now? Now we are both zombies. I tried to sleep a bit later in the afternoon, but no luck.

I caught up a bit on the phone with the Sibs, who got back from California late last night, but we could use an afternoon together. She was away for 10 days and we only had one real conversation during that time, which is not enough for us.

Well, I am just exhausted. I need to go move some cat towels to the dryer, and then collapse. I know, TMI, the whole cat thing is TMI. This is my exciting life, folks.

WATCHING VH1 :: ENTRY #1529

Addled

I've been thinking for the last few hours that I would write an entry here, but I already wrote one today, and it's just confusing to write two in one day -- I don't know why I think that -- so I thought I'd check and see what today's entry said and dang if I didn't write yet today. I'm getting OLD, folks!

I have not met the Lincoln impersonator, so I don't know what he looks like, but I think there's a picture of him in some exhibit down there, so I guess I'll see. Except if I see a picture of him in Gettysburg, I guess he'll look like Lincoln, so I still won't know what he looks like in real life. I expect I'll meet him some day; I'll let you know.

I still HAVE NOT PACKED. I've got a variety of things assembled and I picked up a few items I needed. But we're probably not leaving until after lunch tomorrow, so I guess I'll get it done. All my laundry is done and everything is put away, so it shouldn't be hard to find any clothes I need. I doubt that I need anything fancier than jeans, anyway, so that's easy. The only thing I apparently no longer own is shorts. I could not find a single pair of shorts, even something I would wear to the gym. I have acquired a whole lot of capri-length gym wear over the last year, but I guess I dumped all the shorts for some reason. Not that I really need them, but should I decide to enjoy the hot tub at some point, I need something to wear over a bathing suit on the way there. But even that's not definite until I try on a bathing suit tomorrow morning and decide if I'm even going to do that.

I shared my DisneyWorld dilemma with K today, who gave me this advice: get over it. She said, You have the chance to take a trip to your favorite place in the world with two people whose company you enjoy. And your problem is ...? Ah, how wise she is. So I need to chill a little and let go of the crazy. At some point after I get back, I'll call the hotel we're thinking of going to down there and check on some things. Up to four people can stay in a room, or as they put it everywhere, "sleeps a family of four." That's assuming a family of four people sharing two beds. Three unrelated adults? I would prefer three beds, please, but I don't know if that's a possibility. I discussed this with my sister on the phone last night -- she's in California -- and tell me is this is weird. I am a grown woman. I would share a queen sized bed with any of the following:

1. my husband
2. either of my daughters
3. my sister

and that's it. No? Traveling with a friend is one thing. Sharing a bed is quite another. Tell me if I'm wrong.

I just stopped for a minute to help K give Boo is medicine. I think this is not going to be fun for her for the next few days.

So we're off tomorrow after lunch. I'm bringing my computer so I'll probably post from there at some point.

WATCHING E! :: ENTRY #1523

Potterization, Phase I

First, let me just say that people my age shouldn't even take vacations. Why? Because. (And is it embarrassing that one of my kids sent her parents the link to this article? Although I had already seen it myself.)

Okay, so, Potter, Phase I. K and I saw the movie (HP and the Order of the Phoenix) this afternoon. Did I like yet? Yes and no. It looks great, parts of it look incredible. The acting, very good. It's the same with any book that you know really well that gets made into a movie: you tend to notice what's missing almost more than what's there. I need to see the movie again, which no doubt I will, before I'm truly comfortable with it. In the meantime, now I feel like picking up The Half-Blood Prince before the new book comes out on Friday, even though I just read it again a few weeks ago. I'm just wild about Harry.

So it seems that I am making these plans to go to DisneyWorld with the Other Chai, right? Which I mentioned in an email to the Chum, who lives in Maine for the summer. I mentioned it in passing (as in my surprise that the Other Chai appears to be going through with it), although I had mentioned to her before that we were talking about going. She says, maybe she'll join us there.

Now, tell me: should I be pleased or annoyed? Who is the one person outside of my family I have been trying to get to DisneyWorld with for years? The Chum. It's come up several times over the years we've known each other. Finally, maybe five years ago, after her husband had bypass surgery, she said that she could never go, because she would never leave him for that long. Seemed pretty much a closed case to me.

But now, and for the last year, maybe year and a half, she goes to Florida every six to eight weeks because her mother lives there and has been having health issues. So she goes. She's even going once in the middle of the summer from Maine. Anyway, she figures she's going to Florida in November anyway, so she would join us in Orlando from wherever it is she goes to her mother. (Not far from Miami, I think.)

Well. I would have preferred going with just the Chum, since the Other Chai can be a challenge, but I'm not sure how it will be with the three of us. (Although the two of them go way back as well, but not as far as I go with either one of them.) I can't book the trip for three when we book, but I don't know if they'll let us add another person to our room at a later time. And if three of us are going, I think we need to get a better (i.e., bigger) room so that it's not just two double beds. Oy. Complications. Can't anything ever be easy?

Speaking of which, R is all embroiled with complicated friend plans for the weekend, the upshot of which is that she's coming here after work and staying over for the night. I just paused to discuss this with K and got another detail or two, but neither one of us knows what's going on, it turns out. At some point, R will be here. She will show up in her car or we will pick her up at the train. She will have dinner with us or she will have eaten before she arrives, or she and K will go out for sushi.

Boo is on the new food and is getting his medicine more or less, and seems pretty much exactly the way he was before. Which is okay, actually, since he didn't seem sick before, he just needed to be checked out. Whatever.

I need to pack tomorrow. Or at least sometime before we leave in Sunday, I think. I have no idea what the weather is supposed to be there, although I imagine I could look that up pretty easily. You know, most trips I go on, I plan obsessively before I go. (See all references to DisneyWorld, for example.) But other than making the hotel reservation, I'm not planning anything here. The Hubs will figure out how to get there, and pretty much, what to do there. He has a friend who is a Lincoln impersonator -- I kid you not -- who's giving him all kinds of tips and advice. Hey, he oughta know, right?

WATCHING MASH :: ENTRY #1523

Bliss!

I got a haircut today, and when I came out and got into my car at 1.22 pm and turned on the radio ....

Ahhhhhhhh.

There it was. The wonderful oldies station had come back, as promised, at 1.01 pm. The afternoon deejay is one of the familiar old-timers, and I knew all the songs. All of their promos are very cute, too, referring to the station being missed and now it's back. I listened to it at home later, too, while I was *ahem* cleaning. When K got home from class, she said that she had listened to it, too, on the way to and from school. The funny thing is that she said the oldies may be the music of my childhood, but it's the music of her childhood, too, since it's the radio station I listened to as she was growing up.

Other news ... hmm. I haven't packed a thing, but I did start making a list. So that's something. I guess I'll start tomorrow. But the big plans for tomorrow involve going to see Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Really looking forward to it, and to the book next week. (Okay, really looking forward to the book next week.)

The vet called last night with the results of Boo's bloodwork, which are either good or bad, depending, I guess, on your point of view. Or depending on where things go from here. His kidneys are stable. He shows a slight infection. But he is extremely anemic. If the anemia is being caused by his gastrointestinal ailment, well, he's on new food and a strong antibiotic, so that should help. If it's caused by something else, then it will probably continue to decline. The vet said that most cats would not live with the level of anemia he has, but it's clearly come on him gradually, so he's adjusted to it. Much lower, though, and it would not "be compatible with life." Let me just say how fond I am of this particular vet. He is also very personal and compassionate. A lovely man.

So my only concern now, really, is that the cat could take a sudden turn while the Hubs and I are away. I think this is unlikely, given the fact that Boo has had the "expect-the-end-soon" diagnosis more than once over the last five years, but it's a possibility, and one that I am not sharing with K before we go. I may share a bit with R, though, so she knows to be on call for her sister if something happens. And we'll only be a few hours away, and in our own car, so getting home in an emergency is not a problem. But I don't really think it's coming that soon. Possibly by the end of the summer, but I don't think before that. And then again, you never know.

My sister is away now, for about 10 days I think, which leaves me without my main source of outside conversation. It's always weird when she goes away. I'll hear from her a few times while she's gone -- she's in California visiting her firstborn -- but those are just "Hey, I'm still alive" phone calls, not real conversations. But her middle son is away too, out of the country, in fact, which must be leaving Wonderful Niece feeling pretty deserted by everyone (except her husband, of course.) I just wrote myself a note to call her tomorrow; it'll be good for both of us.

So that's it, then.

WATCHING MASH :: ENTRY #1522

Wednesday

First, let me just say that I've been having lots of trouble with leaving Haloscan comments for people recently, so it's not that I'm not reading or thinking or wanting to leave comments for you guys, I just haven't been able to.

Took BooBoo to the vet today. He now weights 4.8 pounds, so he is one little cat. And half of that is fur. Anyway, the vet gave him some new food to eat and an antibiotic, in case his problem is some sort of stomach bug, and took blood to see if he's anemic or if his kidney disease is progressing. Either way, he seems perfectly happy when he's awake -- he sleeps a lot, but that is, after all, a cat's job, and he's 16 years old -- and eats and drinks well, and all that. So there's the medical update on my little old man.

I went to the chiropractor again -- that is a strange experience, isn't it? I'm not one of those people who feels the need to "crack my back" all the time, and it seems very strange and a little frightening each time I hear that crack. But it seems to leave me feeling pretty good, so I'll go with that.

My surprise yesterday, in my very busy day, is the the Other Chai called in the morning, and we're going to get together to plan the Disney trip after I get home next week. In honor of now believing that we're really going, I went to Barnes aned Noble and bought the current Birnbaum DisneyWorld book. It makes me feel like I'm really going, and I haven't been there for six years -- !! -- and I know a lot has changed since then. I don't find the website that easy to navigate, unless you're looking for something specific; the book is better for a general overview. I've put Ingrid Bergmann aside for a few days, but I'll take her with me on the trip.

My sister can't believe that I haven't started packing yet, and neither can I. I always pack well in advance of wherever I'm going; it's just part of my charm. I could pack for DisneyWorld in November now, but for next week? I don't know, maybe I don't get the reality of it yet, or I don't know what to bring. It's a very surreal thing, this trip.

WATCHING THE GOLDEN GIRLS :: ENTRY #1521

Someone Stop This Crazy Thing!

Seriously, I need a vacation. Or a day off. With any luck, it'll be Sunday. I can hold on until then.

I fell asleep at work again today. This time, it was around 1.15, and I sat in a chair in the office and didn't even put my head down on the desk. I sat slumped a little and let my head lean forward. I'm getting to be good at this, sleeping upright in a chair. Sheesh.

I think my dland is back, in a manner of speaking, but I'm not posting any real entries there until this is all worked out, if then. I will post a little update thing so that my link turns red on the buddies page, but it may take a day to show up, like my last entry did. But I think it's all there.

And yes, I have two buddies lists on this page. I'm working things out.

Okay, so, enjoyed the play again last night, going tonight. My nephew from California is in, and as always, some kind of turmoil always seems to surround him, although he's always the calm at the center. His new thing is that he got his mother an iPod for Mother's Day/her birthday -- notice I didn't say bought, I'm sure he hooked up a free iPod from somewhere -- and he wants to put my music on it. Since one of the things he's famous for is using other people's stuff and breaking it, at the very least, not leaving it in the condition he found it, this was unsettling, and I told him it wouldn't work, either. If he syncs the new iPod to my computer to get the music, then when he tries to sync it to his mother's computer so she can manage it, it'll ask for my password and want to authorize that computer on my iTunes account. Which is a very bad plan. But no, he only wants to put music on hers and leave it like that and not even put iTunes on her computer. Or something. Whatever. He says "It'll take 20 minutes!" but I think it'll take hours just to decide what music of mine to copy over, since he got her a 4 gig iPod and I have 12 gigs of stuff. See? It's always something with him. But you gotta love him. Or we do, I guess, because he's ours. But it's always something.

K got a new tattoo today, which is very nice, but I don't have a good picture because my camera flashed funny, so I'll have to get her to send me the one I took for her with her camera, which came out great. You remember my whole camera drama with her last month. That worked out, anyway.

The newest hearing aid wrinkle -- I may have mentioned something somewhere yesterday -- is that the big fix did not work and the audiologist asked me to keep a log and he'll get back on it Monday. So I was keeping a log last night and all morning. At some point today, I'm thinking just before or after my little nap at school, the volume got turned up on the hearing aids, to a slightly uncomfortable degree, actually, but the thing is: I think they're working. I think they haven't muted themselves since I turned the volume up. Now, tonight at the play, I'm going to be hearing the actors' heartbeats, but if I don't go all muted, I'll also hear every word of dialogue. So, an interesting development. We shall see what the weekend brings.

Meantime, I feel like I'm pedaling as fast as I can. Still in hyperactive mode (except for when I fall asleep at work, I guess.) Once the play is over tomorrow night, I think I can finally stop, but until then ... pedal, pedal, pedal. So my nephew is coming over tomorrow morning, my in-laws will be stopping by before the play so we can go over there together, which means that I have to clean in the afternoon, or at least, get the giant economy packs of toilet paper and paper towels out of the living room. And find the Boo poo wherever it is. Did I mention that I actually found some in the litter box the other day? But he was just teasing me, because he hasn't done that since.

I feel like I have a year's worth of laundry to do. I have no dishtowels in the kitchen. K washed a load of towels yesterday, but there's a load in the dryer and a load in the laundry basket that may be clean, or maybe not. She's upstairs getting dressed for tonight. It's a challenge, folks, since she's got a freshly inked tattoo on her back. Has to be covered, so the people sitting behind us don't get grossed out, but it's damn hot in that auditorium. Plus she's going to get a million hugs from her cousins and all sorts of people. Maybe she could have waited until next week. But hey, I probably wouldn't have, so who am I to say?

I did break down yesterday and turn the air conditioning on. It was 81 degrees when I got home from the play the night before at 10.30. That means it was over 90 up in K's room. It's comfortable in the house now, anyway. Jeez, I hope it doesn't snow over the weekend.

Okay, okay. The sound of the computer fan is starting to get to me; it's really loud, as is everything else. It rained before, and let me tell you, a scary sound, amplified.

watching Ellen :: entry #1461

Poop. Poopedy-Poop-Poop.

Fine, and yours?

It's been a more literal poopy day than figurative, which is either better or worse; I haven't decided. After managing to finish the school day despite the return of what I can only call dysentery, I came home to find several paper towels on the living room and hallway rugs, which are how we mark spots that have been recently cleaned of cat poop and/or vom, so as to avoid stepping on them. Boo was a busy boy today. A little while ago, I sat down on the living room chair (which is covered by a towel) to talk to R on the phone, and I realized that I had sat in some. While we were talking (after I changed out of my jeans and put them in the wash), the Hubs came home, turned on the light in his little room and I heard, appropriately enough, "Shit!" and it was on the floor in there, too. So, poop today, and plenty of it.

I had to talk to the principal again today, which is good, I suppose, in that I got in to see him and resolved some issues, and he really is always very pleasant to me, but I just don't like it. I kid around with him and all, and that's okay, but I'd rather just not. I'm too old for that, um, crap.

My cold is still annoying, but I guess improving, I don't know. It really took a back seat to my other concerns. On the other hand, the Anatomy teacher, who hangs out in the library on her free period so we chat, LOVES me. Whatever she's teaching, I've got a problem with it. Seriously. I could be a guest lecturer in her class on the brain, the gastroinstestinal system, hearing, balance ... you name it. Her topic for today was viruses, and I'm right on top of that one. I accused her of wanting me to be her guest cadaver so she could dissect me as the best lesson of all, but she declined.

Okay, it's getting late and I'm drifting. I really liked that book I just finished, btw, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal. If you're a bit of a non-traditionalist but enjoy a good Bible story, give it a go.

watching Gilmore Girls :: entry #1448

Getting a Grip

Or more than a grip, a handle. A lot happened this last week, my so-called vacation. Time to go back to work tomorrow. So here I am, trying to get the week into focus, trying to get a handle on all of it.

It seems like there was a lot, an unusual amount of a lot, for one week. There were many things that happened that would each by itself overshadow a week, would be the significant thing that happened in that week, but are now all paling in comparison to the biggest thing of all, which was little Q dying. Nothing else quite comes close.

Not the hours I spent working on the flood-damaged basement, leaving me with a tremendous sense of accomplishment.

Not being sick all week with the Chameleon Virus, the one that changes from stomach bug to hives to head cold. The head cold is killing me today. I hope tomorrow is at least better for that. And going to the doctor twice.

Got two of the cars serviced. The plumber was here. I guess those aren't big things, but they require planning and coordination enough to be noticed by me. They don't just happen.

Finally, finally got to have lunch with the Sibs and the gang today, and that really was a lot of fun and great to see them all. Not a one of them even spilled the beans about their older brother coming in to see R's play. (Actually, he'll just be here from California that week by coincidence, so he's coming, but R won't know until she sees him in the lobby.)

And R's new apartment. We really are all excited about this and looking forward to it in many ways. Today at lunch, she even asked Wonderful Niece about the stray cats that seem to call her yard home, and to keep an eye out for kittens. (WN adopted both of her kittens when they seemed to be separated from their litters and left behind by their mothers, right there in her own backyard.) So there's even a possible kitten source for her.

An oddly bittersweet week. Now I wish I had a week off to recover from it. Not altogether looking forward to going back to work tomorrow. I have .... let's see ... exactly 8 weeks left, and in there one day off for Memorial Day and one professional day when I'm going to workshops. Maybe I'll take a personal day when R moves, if she wants me there, but that's up to her.

Okay, whatever. Back to work.


watching Gilmore Girls :: entry #1446

So It Goes

Some days are hard to follow with just regular days, but as the great man said, so it goes. Thank you all so much for your kind words and sympathy.

(I'm thinking, btw, that my reward tattoo when I've lost the rest of the weight is going to be So it goes. According to Kurt Vonnegut, it's what they say on the planet Tralfalmadore when somebody dies. It's what he's most often quoted for. I bet I won't even be the first person to get that tattooed, either.)

So, the next day. K is having a very hard time with it. R has a lot going on, and that distracts her, and I am just older, I guess. Of course it's sad; we are all sad. K, I think, is depressed. She needs something to distract her, too. Well, tomorrow we are finally having that lunch with the Sibs and her kids, Monday is K's last day of classes for the semester, and this week will be her last at the Giant Jeans Conglomerate. Hopefully, she'll also sub a few days this week.

In the meantime, my allergies have kicked in big time, and I woke up this morning (after a terrible night's sleep) with a sore throat, achy ears, and the whole stuffy/runny nose experience. I've been pretty miserable all day. My stomach does seem to be settling down, though. And we were distracted for part of the day.

R's roommate is moving out, not because of any falling out between them, but that was leaving R with a three bedroom apartment she couldn't handle on her own, and trouble finding a new roommate. Even though she was happy where she was, she realized that it would be best to start looking for her own place, alone. She had appointments to see two today, so K and I went with her.

One was a studio in a fairly large apartment building in Jersey City. Ten years ago, you would not have wanted to move to Jersey City, and ten years from now, everyone will be dying to move there. 2007 ... not so sure yet. Anyway, it's too far and the apartment, a studio, wasn't great. Then we went to see a one-bedroom in the city she's living in now, just a few blocks away from where she's already living.

It was just adorable. It looks like a very old building, older than the 1917 the owners think it is, and full of charming details. A small apartment building with six or seven apartments in it. I think it must have been a large single family house once, but was cut up into units long ago. There are three floors; the place was saw was on the third floor, up a winding staircase. (Love those.)

Anyway, it's two nice size rooms and a bathroom. The first room has the kitchen in it, but there's also room to make it a living room/dining room. And there's actually a back porch, of all charming little details. After much discussion, and R saying she would call the owners on Monday morning, she called them this afternoon, so the place is hers. I think she'll be very happy there. And it met one of her most important criteria:

She can have a cat there.

Which makes me feel worse for K, since now R has the chance to get her very own kitten, while K mourns for little Q. (We still have BooBoo, of course, who actually pooped in the litter box today, first time in years. Interesting.)

Okay, time to collapse somewhere.


watching -- :: entry #1445

So Long, Sweetie

Our little Q has gone to rejoin the continuum.




watching -- :: entry #1444