Gone Missing

LA asked in a comment if I'd gone missing, and in a way, I have, although not intentionally. It's more a matter of not having the wherewithall to do anything in the evenings when I'm home. By seven, the latest, I'm usually under a blanket with a heating pad on my feet. I've only started reading again, really, this week.

I miss writing, although I'm keeping up with reading you all. Every day, I think, I need to write today, but what to write? Where to start? What to include? I've always wondered about those diarists I read who stop writing for so long that I think they've given up, and one day there they are again, just a regular entry; it makes me feel as if they've been writing somewhere all along, and I've missed it. You know, I haven't read anything in a year, and they start with something like "Let me tell you how it turned out with Bob when he was here last week" or something else absurdly current, and I'm "Huh?" That is not my plan.

It is also not my plan to make this a list of my medical complaints, as you know, but it sometimes turns into that, and I'll include some of that here, just because it's so weird. But first, a bit of recap:

I am not depressed, which is always nice, but a little weirded out by what's going on. (See below.)

Still no job for K, but a nice interview last week at a museum, fingers crossed.

The FIL is still in the hospital, I'm sure I've mentioned that already. He had congestive heart failure, and is now, I understand, refusing to take some of his medication because presumably he believes he knows better than all the doctors. We also heard yesterday that they had to change his room because he was yelling at his roommate. If this is true, then he also has dementia, but it doesn't seem like it can be true because it's not like him, unless the roommate was bothering him first.

Okay, here's my story. I feel the same, no better, no worse. Some days I gots pain, some days, not so much. I saw Resnick last week (the G.I.) and he says I have something called "anemia of disease" which is a kind of anemia you get with chronic illnesses. My iron is high, so I totally don't understand this. He says that just to be sure, he wants a hematologist to review my labwork. So I said to him "Hmm. When I think heamatologist, I think oncologist." He says, oh no no, he sees no sign of that in my bloodwork and he's 95% sure it's this anemia of disease, but he's sending me to THE BEST hematologist and he'll tell us for sure. Okay, says I, who is this guy? He gives me the doctor's name.

The doctor who was my mother's oncologist.

Yes, all oncologists (that's cancer specialists) are also hematologists (that's blood specialists), although not always vice-versa. This guy does both, apparently, and I already know him and he's one of my favorite doctors of all time. But I'm having a post-traumatic stress thing going on here at the thought of going back into that office. I do not have happy memories associated with going there, although I love this doctor. So that's next Wednesday.

Oh, and did I mention that the brain tumor was diagnosed 18 years ago THIS WEEK? That I spent the morning before Thanksgiving -- essentially now -- in school, at the big pep rally, running out into the hall in tears every five minutes? Of course, I was waaaay better as soon as I got home from school and decided that my sister and I would go to Disney World the upcoming April, which we did. But this week holds lots and lots of stressful memories for me too.

In other news, I have overcome the most recent money crisis, which I think was also keeping me from writing, because it was much on my mind, and tomorrow is Thanksgiving, held this year at the home of Wonderful Niece. I start my cooking tonight. So far, it looks like our traditional meal with a few new things thrown in, but nothing left out. After a few false starts, my sister has given up trying to remake it in some weird image. Looking forward to a great day.

Reading. I'm going to post this from my phone, so I won't have my normal entry #/what I'm watching/reading at the bottom. I've read Homer and Langley this week, the new book by E.L. Doctorow, which I liked, and two YA dystopia books by Suzanne Collins, the first two books in a trilogy: The Hunger Games and Catching Fire. Liked them both. Also The Guinea Pig Diaries by A.J. Jacobs, who is funny. And now, of all things, Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden, which my sister has been trying to get me to read for years, and I'm liking it very much. I'm building up my strength to read New York: The Novel, by Edward Rutherfurd, which is some 900 pages long and I've got it as an ebook. So I'll be at it for some time.

Well, I'm back, baby. A wonderful Thanksgiving to you all, remember, it's my favorite holiday, and I hope it's a nice one for you as well. See you again soon.


-- Post From My iPhone