Propping My Head Up
I slept strangely the last two nights, waking up every hour or so, and having creepy dreams that would continue when I went back to sleep. I'm pretty wiped out today, and my family is once again stressing me out. I shall recap.
Had a wonderful lunch out on Saturday, which I've already mentioned, but at some point the topic of who's smoking and who's not smoking came up, and somebody mentioned that the Hubs had stopped smoking. I had not mentioned this to my sister for any number of reasons. For one, if she had casually remarked to him (like if he answered the phone or something) "Oh, I hear you stopped smoking" he might freak out because he doesn't like people talking about him. (Or he could have had a sane moment and had a normal conversation with her about it.) Next, I would have had to tell her about his endless coughing fits and the temper outbursts that sometimes follow, and although I'm not embarrassed by this, per se, it meant I would have had to tell her that this stressed me out and made me sick, a little, for a week or so, and as you may recall, that's what I'm trying to avoid. Letting her know when I'm not feeling well because it causes an extreme reaction in her. (For a mini-relapse that I know will pass; I'll tell her when I'm really sick.)
Anyway, now she knows something is up and wants to know why I'm keeping it from her. Oy vey. I don't want to tell her on the phone unless I'm home alone (lest he overhear and be bothered by it) and I'm rarely home alone. She wants to know why I didn't tell her when we had dinner last week or whenever it was. I'm trying to explain to her, sotto voce, that when things are calm I need to keep them calm to keep my stress levels down; I don't want to think about it when I don't have to.
In the meantime, after coughing for literally two and a half hours Friday night, the Hubs did some yard work Saturday and yesterday, and took a nice long walk yesterday. This indicates to me that he is not as interested in killing himself as he said he was a month ago -- he was interested in saying it, not doing it -- and he is making plans for the future (he has tomato and other seedlings growing in the living room window), and he is thinking about his health in a positive way by taking the walk. So the weekend was not bad where he was concerned; he even coughed much, much less Saturday and Sunday. On the other hand,
the kid is sick. She has, I think, an upper respiratory infection on top of allergies, and I know she feels terrible and looks terrible but I'm sorry, she and her father are just freaking babies when they are sick. (And the Hubs was never like this before, only with this not-smoking sickness.) When K is not hiding out up in her room (which she doesn't do enough, as far as I'm concerned) she's sitting or lying somewhere near me moaning "Mommy, I'm sick!" Yes, folks, 24 years old in two weeks.
So this morning I was expecting quiet in the house. The Hubs was taking a day off for god knows what reason; he takes off one day every few years, and K couldn't work because she's sick. So I figured, Ah, no one else up in the morning, I'll have the whole house to myself. I thought I could sleep later, but of course no, I woke up at 5:30, ten minutes before my alarm. And I was rolling along, relaxing a bit on my morning routine, when what should I hear but K's door open. Yes, folks, she was too sick to sleep, and thought it would be a great idea to engage me in conversation, which meant she began to moan "Mommy, I'm sick! I can't breathe!" and so on. Let me tell you what would happen if I tried to engage her in conversation on any given morning. You would see the resultant explosion over New Jersey from every part of the globe. (I shall not yet again post a "Katie Kaboom!" video clip, but you could find it on Youtube and get the general idea.)
Anyway, I had time and she needed medicine, so I took her to the CVS and then dropped her off at home and went on to school, where I was like a zombie all day, but actually got lots and lots of stuff done. And all day I'm thinking "Oy, I'm so glad I'm here and not at home."
So that's the day. Unless there's been some kind of miracle cure, she's not going to class tonight. And it's been pouring all day, so I know he hasn't done any yardwork, although I suspect he stayed home to get some work-work done without the distractions of being in his office.
I think I shall sleep through this afternoon's mandatory faculty meeting.
P.S. Later, at home. I haven't seen the kid yet, but she went to the doctor this morning and got an antibiotic, and is now sleeping. (Of course, if she doesn't get up at a reasonable time, I shall have to go upstairs and make sure she's breathing. Yes, 24 in two weeks; she's not the only freak in the family.) And the Hubs, to show you how erratic he is, when I got home his car was gone but there was a message on the machine to call his cell phone. Seems he went somewhere and locked his keys in the car. I drove over and gave him a spare set, but he was laughing at himself and amused by the whole thing, something that could make anyone angry.
Come to think of it, I wouldn't mind a cigarette myself. Oh, just kidding.
WATCHING THE GOLDEN GIRLS :: ENTRY #1714
Family dynamics are always a hoot. You can't win for losing.
ReplyDeleteHusband brought a cold home. Because of his COPD, it sounds terrible, but his moans are more for sympathy (which he no longer gets). He does no inhale his medication -- which might help.
In his generosity, he has given the infection to U.D. and me. (Durn! We got through the whole winter without colds.) After two days of misery, she and I are doing better, but he is not. He reinfects himself constantly. I'll spend another day disinfecting while he's at day care.
On a similar note, my dad's first heart attack caused pain in his throat; he was sure he had throat cancer and quit smoking immediately. But he stopped coughing; my mother said she no longer knew where he was.