Talking Trash

I'm going to talk a little politics while it's fresh in my mind. There must have been a debate on Sunday that I didn't know about, but I caught the replay Sunday night on C-Span. A word about the debates: I think I've watched every Democratic debate, but maybe only a bit of one of the Republicans. This is for two reasons, maybe three. One, I never seem to know when a Republican debate is going to be on. Two, I think there are fewer Republican debates than Democratic. And three, let's be frank, I'm not voting for a Republican because I know from the get-go that I disagree with all of them, so there's no need for me to watch them debate so that I can make an informed choice of my preferred candidate. The answer is none of them; they all infuriate me for one reason or another.

But tonight I'm going to give my run-down on the Democratic candidates, all of them who appear regularly in the debates. These would be, in no particular order except the way the were standing in the debate I just watched (Iowa):

Dennis Kucinich
Joe Biden
Bill Richardson
Barack Obama
Mike Gravel
John Edwards
Chris Dodd
Hilary Clinton

Okay, that's it, eight. Let's start by saying a polite thank-you to Mike Gravel for everything he did for us 35 years ago, and then let's send him home. 35 years ago, he was da bomb, and I wanted to vote for him in 1972. But now, bye-bye former Senator Gravel. Enjoy retirement.

Next, Chris Dodd and Joe Biden, whom I group together because I think they have the same equal shot at the presidency: none. And there are lots of things I like about Biden, and a few I like about Dodd, but they are not going to be president. They should, however, have positions of importance in the next administration, especially Biden, because he's smart and has lots of interesting experience.

The front runner, they say, is Hillary Clinton, and I'm sorry, I just can't get behind her. For one, I don't agree with several of the positions she takes, and that's big. For another, and this isn't original with me but I can't remember where I heard it; maybe Bill Maher said it on Larry King, but I'm not sure. I think there's an excellent chance that the right wing/religious fundamentalists/Karl Rove et al. or someone has some juicy dirt on the Clintons that they've been saving for just such an occasion. I want to vote for a president who is as beyond reproach as anyone who's lived an actual life could possibly be. It's not Hillary. I got no problem with having a woman for president, of course, but not this particular woman. (Speaking of 1972, I so wanted to be able to vote for Barbara Jordan one day, but it was not to be.)

I really really really want to like John Edwards. I liked him last time, and I think he has pretty much everything it takes. So why isn't he the front runner? It's as if he has some secret weakness that keeps him from rising to the top. I would be happy with him as our president, but I don't know if he has what it takes to get himself there.

I adore Dennis Kucinich. I like that he's out of the box; he says everything in a completely straightforward, no bullshit, not-politician-y way, and he addresses the issues that need to be addressed. In each question he answers though, he spits out some quick fix program that he's got all worked out already, and "when I'm in the White House" that's what going to happen. Uh ... doubtful. The president has got to play politics with Congress to make things work, and I'm doubtful that Kucinich has those skills. But I'd like to have him over for dinner, or get him to speak at a school assembly.

I got two left, eh?

I had decided this morning, before I watched this debate, that I was going to have to get behind Obama. I agree with most of what he says, and his only real flaw is lack of experience. Think about it: this is not necessarily a fatal flaw for a president. It's not as if he's on his own. He's surrounded by advisors. If Barack Obama were president, and say, Bill Clinton was the Secretary of State, and the rest of these Democratic hopefuls were strategically placed, he'd probably be pretty damn good.

Except he said a few things tonight that I did not like. So I'm still re-thinking him.

And Bill Richardson? Let's see. He's been a cabinet member, he's the governor of a troubled state, he's negotiated treaties between countries, he was the ambassador to the United Nations. And each time I've seen him, he's said things that are 100% what I agree with.

So where does that leave me? The best Richardson can hope for is a vice-presidential spot, and I'm okay with that. I do think he'd make the best president out of this crop of bozos, but I'll settle for v.p. With Obama? Maybe, but that's an odd ticket, our first African-American candidate for president paired with a v.p. candidate with some Latino roots. (Although I'm guessing not the first to have had a mother [in his case] or a grandparent from Mexico or another Hispanic country.) Richardson is also pretty straightforward in what he says, and I think that would help anyone he's running with.

Which leads me back to John Edwards, who is whiter than white (sorry, a derogatory term I generally avoid, but we're in political context here) and comes from a very humble background and who is very human and for whom poverty and the average people are a key issue. All good. I think there will be a certain amount of chaos when his wife dies, but they surely know it's coming, and they will have planned for it as best they can. That is some amazing family they have there.

So I guess I'm hoping that Edwards will step up to the plate and take charge, and that Richardson will be his running mate. Perhaps Obama will shape up more, too, but I don't see that as a ticket as likely to win.

And if the Republicans run Fred Thompson, the most absurd candidate ever, I don't know what I'll do. At least we all know what an asshole Giuliani is already. Thompson, it's like they're keeping him hidden until they can spring a full-blown campaign on everyone, which I'm sure is all kinds of illegal. And I also believe that the reason Karl Rove is resigning is to take charge of the Thompson campaign, because if Thompson wins, it's like the whole Bush team is still in charge. He's not a politician, not really, he's an actor. He'll do whatever Cheney tells him to do. And we already know how that kind of thing plays out.

Remember, folks, you heard it here first.

WATCHING --- :: ENTRY #1560